Self-defense course

Module 4 — Subway, Bus & Night Travel

Lesson 38 of 50If someone sits too close

14 min

Dr. Mira explains · Module 4 — Subway, Bus & Night Travel · Lesson 38

Dr. Mira explaining lesson 38: If someone sits too close

Dr. Mira's selected Voice Calibration voice

Transcript

Hi, sweetheart. It's Dr. Mira. Welcome to lesson 38: If someone sits too close. Moving without confrontation. Let me walk you through this properly, the way I would if we were sitting together. Plan your exit before you ever need it. Knowing the way out calms your body before anything happens. On the platform, stand back from the edge, near a pillar or the staffed booth, with your back not fully exposed. Pick the conductor's car at night — it is the middle of the train, and there is always a worker in it. Inside the car, sit where you can see the doors and where you have a clear path to stand up. Stand where other people can see you. Light and cameras are your friends. If your stomach tightens, change cars at the next stop. You do not need proof. Trust that signal. The first thirty seconds above ground matter most. Step out, move away from the stairwell, orient, then start walking with purpose. Now here's how I want you to practice. Read the lesson once, picture yourself doing it, and then do it for real one time today. One repetition is enough to start. If it feels awkward the first time, that's normal. Awkward means new, not wrong. That's all for this one. Watch it as many times as you need. I'm so proud of you for being here.

What this lesson covers

Moving without confrontation.

Module goal: Move through the subway, buses and late-night streets with a plan already made.

What you'll be able to do

Handle someone sitting too close without confrontation.

Key points

  • Moving is not rude and not defeat. It is the correct move.
  • Do it early, before it becomes a conversation.

Step by step

  1. 1Stand up as if it's your stop.
  2. 2Move to a different part of the car, near other people.
  3. 3If they follow, change cars at the next stop and tell staff.

Say this, exactly

  • I'm moving. (Nothing more is required.)

Common mistakes

  • Staying because you don't want to seem impolite.

New York City scenario

Someone slides next to you in an empty car. You stand, move two doors down, and they stay put.

Practice drill

Give yourself permission out loud: 'I'm allowed to move seats.'

Quick check

If they follow you to your new seat?